J is 20 minutes late. It doesnʼt look like he is gonna show. I am in a cafe on union street. The place is in between busy and quiet. I canʼt find the word to describe it - steady flow? They buy rolls, sweet and savoury pastries with hot drinks like tea and coffee. The table facing me is full of empty light boxes. An electrician is fitting new lights in the place. I will wait till half past, I say to no one.
the hierarchy
of rust
- silent shadows
Later that same day A has a checkup at the hospital today. Regular stuff - bloods, urine and listening to the babyʼs heart beat. A is nervous about the bloods. I am ok and I tell her it is ok and I mean it. And it is ok. Later while we walk home under a blue winter sky I think about the sound of the babyʼs heart.
________
She smells different. I cut the edamame and dreams into halves. I change my thoughts about the dried apricots sitting in the fridge beside the butter. I spread the sauerkraut best I can - itʼs not exactly ketchup. My mind flits to medicine. She knows.
out of season fruit -
we watch a documentary about
french cowboys
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